Stepping into your first counselling session can be a daunting experience. If you’ve never had counselling before, it’s natural to feel uncertain about what lies ahead. That’s why I wanted to write this blog—to help ease your mind and give you a clear idea of what to expect during your initial session.

Counselling: A Safe Space, Not a Quick Fix

One of the first things to understand about counselling is that it’s not about receiving advice or being told what to do. I won’t wave a magic wand to make everything better instantly. Instead, counselling is a collaborative process that requires dedication and active participation from you, the client. This means attending sessions regularly and being open to some of the suggestions I may offer for you to reflect on throughout the week.

My role as your counsellor is to provide a safe, non-judgmental space where we can explore your thoughts, feelings, and experiences together. This is your space, your time, and your session—designed to place your needs at the forefront.

Busting the Myths: No Couches, Just Comfort

For those who imagine a counselling session to resemble a classic Freud scene—where the client lies on a couch while the therapist takes notes—let me assure you, that’s not how modern counselling works. If you’re coming in for a face-to-face session, you’ll find comfortable chairs in a welcoming, confidential office. For online or telephone sessions, I recommend finding a cozy, private spot free from distractions, where you can speak openly without fear of being overheard.

The First Session: What Happens?

Your first counselling session is primarily about getting to know each other and setting the stage for future work together. Here’s a breakdown of what typically happens:

1. Collecting Basic Information: I’ll begin by asking for some basic details like your name, address, and date of birth. This information is essential for our records and helps ensure your safety and confidentiality.
2. Counselling History: I may ask if you’ve attended counselling before. This helps me understand your past experiences and what worked or didn’t work for you.
3. Explaining the Process: I’ll answer any questions you have about how counselling works. It’s important that you feel comfortable and informed about the process.
4. Discussing the Counselling Contract: We’ll go over a counselling contract. While the word “contract” may sound formal, it’s actually a relaxed agreement that outlines the expectations and requirements set by the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP). This ensures that both you and I are clear about our roles and responsibilities.
5. Exploring Your Goals: We’ll talk about what brought you to counselling and if there are specific goals you’d like to achieve. Whether you’re dealing with a specific issue or just feeling overwhelmed, this is your opportunity to share what’s most important to you.

Throughout the session, I’ll ensure the atmosphere remains relaxed. Remember, this is your space to speak openly and honestly without fear of judgment. My goal is to make you feel comfortable and supported as we begin this journey together.

After the Session: Taking Care of Yourself

Counselling can be a powerful experience, and it’s common to feel a range of emotions during and after a session. You might feel lighter after talking about your concerns, or you might feel tired as you process everything discussed. That’s why I always recommend taking some time for self-care after our sessions.

For instance, if you’re visiting my office, which is nestled in the countryside close to a nature reserve, you might consider taking a walk or drive afterward. Some clients find that listening to chill-out music or simply spending some quiet time alone helps them unwind and reflect on the session.

Whatever your preference, the key is to allow yourself some time to decompress and take care of your emotional well-being.

Final Thoughts

Starting counselling is a brave and positive step towards understanding yourself better and working through your challenges. While the first session might feel a bit nerve-wracking, remember that it’s the beginning of a journey where you are in control. My role is to walk alongside you, offering support, insight, and a safe space to explore whatever is on your mind.

So, if you’re feeling anxious about your first session, know that you’re not alone. It’s completely normal to feel this way, but I hope this blog has helped to demystify the process and reassure you about what to expect. Counselling is your time—your space—and I’m here to help make that experience as positive and productive as possible.